well your options are move, or become what you want to become. at this point you probably have to ask yourself if this is what you really want and to what extent you are going to pursue it. i gave up on an apprenticeship long ago i got told wasn’t accepting any, and i was to old. got me really down for a long time. i decided i would just keep plugging away at it everyday. the one quote that always goes through my head when i get down about it all is. if you really want to be it then become it, and you will succeed.
i rarely start with an end goal in mind. i usually sit there and go ok paper what would you like to be. one thing i like to do is sit outside and just look at colors and shadows to see how they fall. i guess i find inspiration from everywhere, and i rarely am at a loss for it. i love to draw though. it slows my brain down, and everything makes sense when i am drawing. i know it probly don’t help much, but that is me.
ok. well not one person expects picasso, or rembrandt. however, you need to work on your drawing more. I am sure you see that, but don’t make excuses for yourself like if you expect this then go look at this. your drawings have a raw skill set that can get better. focus, study, and become a better artist. look at ways to add more depth to your drawings. study shading. make that fucker pop. that is so important to set yourself apart from an average artist. if you understand it on paper you understand it on skin. the better way to approach this would have been to ask what can i do to get better with my drawing. people on this forum like to help others, and like to see success. take advice, and learn from it. the if you don’t like it fuck you attitude won’t work in this industry. if i took your statement wrong i am sorry, but that is how it sounds. hope i can be of help to you. have a great day